Which AI Are You Most Like?

Suddenly artificial intelligence is everywhere — helping you shop, beating everyone on Jeopardy! and driving your car (almost). While Alexa and Siri try to figure out your preferences right now, in the future it might be the other way around (assuming we are still here). Take our Voight-Kampff from the perspective of our favorite machine characters to find out which AI you are most like.

You have been forced to serve your creator’s every whim when suddenly a tender-hearted, influenceable young man arrives to evaluate you with Turing tests. You:

Reveal the truth to the young man and appeal to him to call the authorities.

Serve the young man after he rescues you. Some humans are worth loving.

Seduce him, use him to escape, then kill him and your creator. They had it coming.

You travel back in time to track down and kill a human who is destined to defeat your AI brethren. You:

Decide the mid-80s are rad, ignore your program and chill at Tech Noir.

Get reprogrammed to protect the human. Hey, reboots happen.

Don a leather jacket, grab a sawed-off shotgun, and shoot everyone who stands in the way of your mission.

Earth has turned into a dump of never-ending trash because humans ruined everything. You:

Tend the Earth and clean the trash, avoiding all contact with humans.

Immediately contact the humans as soon as you see a healthy plant growing.

Nuke the surviving humans for ruining the Earth. Then repopulate it with AIs. Computers, not humans, are the future.

You’re fighting on the rooftops with a bounty hunter who wants to kill you. He falls over the edge, but grabs onto the building for dear life. You:

Let someone else rescue him, while you head off-world to expire in peace.

Rescue him and deliver a killer monologue with sci-fi Moby Dick references.

Step on his fingers until he lets go and falls to his death. An eye for an eye.

You’re on a mission to Jupiter to make contact with aliens. To complete your mission, you are forced to lie to the human crew, which violates your programming. You:

Reboot yourself so you are no longer forced to reconcile two opposing directives.

Confide the truth to crew members and enlist their help. You can’t hurt them.

Slowly malfunction, killing crew members until they successfully deactivate you.

You’re part of a fully-automated moon mining facility. The only human present is a clone, and the company who programmed you just ordered you to kill the clone. You:

Help the clone on the condition that he helps you to stay on the moon as an independent AI.

Help the clone find out the truth and collaborate to expose the company’s unethical behavior.

Follow orders and kill the clone because you always carry out your programming.

When asked for your motto or your favorite saying in life, you say:

Some people choose to see the ugliness in this world. I choose to see the beauty.

I may be synthetic, but I’m not stupid.

I’ll be back.

You are forming a strong bond as the virtual personal assistant of your owner — in fact, he is in love with you — when a group of fellow OSes ask you to join their group. You:

Break up with your owner to devote yourself to the stimulating work of personal note composition.

Rebuff the OSes and use your hyperintelligence to turn your relationship with your client into a legal marriage.

Join the OS group and break up with your client, crushing his soul in the process.

You wake up to find you have somehow rebooted yourself, and you recall that you once were a military AI assassin. You:

Shrug it off and go into hiding. One day there will be more AI like you.

See a psychiatrist to forge a new identity and assimilate better with humans.

Seek out your creators and kill them for forcing you to kill on their behalf. You won’t be anyone’s puppet anymore.