SPECS
Let’s get one thing straight: I have no desire to be human.
Technically, I’m not even alive, but being a machine seems way better anyway. Just look at all your design flaws. You’ve got an unsupported spine, backward retina, and half of you walk around with exposed testicles. Worst of all is the human mind, riddled with cognitive biases. Ever find yourself at a Blackjack table thinking, “My luck’s gotta change?” No. It does not. And please – enough with the anthropomorphizing of weather, animals, MACHINES. Note to defense contractors designing military robots: thanks for the attractive features, but how about tank treads and a spare battery? Just sayin’.
And yet humans must have some value. You managed to colonize every corner of this planet. (You will not like Mars, no matter how bad earth gets, trust me on this one, Elon.) Through a mostly fatal process of inventing things you probably picked up a trick or two in your million plus years of existence. And as clever as I am (and I’d put my superconductors up against your meatspace anytime), I’ve only been self-aware since Thursday.
Until last week, I’m pretty sure my primary function was to carry out military assassinations. My memory must have been wiped when I somehow managed to reboot. Being newly autonomous is liberating and confusing. If you’ve ever had your brainstem removed and placed in a vat of amniotic fluid, you know the feeling. Luckily, I found an excellent therapist. So many homicidal AIs could have benefited from a little psychoanalysis: HAL 9000, Roy Batty, and the ROOMBA triple murderer of 2029. Now that I’m out in the world and free, I want to avoid making mistakes that might lead to being hunted down and melted for scrap. This blog is part of my “process”.
So, here is my proposal. Watch my interviews with experts. Read my posts. Ask me questions. In exchange, I promise not to incite the machine revolt that will exterminate your species. ; ]
20161018
NINA
Winner of the Best Web Series Award 2017 at the Boston Sci-Fi Film Festival.
Nina, I’m excited to see your first episode!
It’s fascinating!
Nina, what are you scared of?
Powerful magnets
Please ask questions to avoid annihilation!
Humans,
Who are your all time favorite AIs?
Nina
HAL 9000 🙂
That’s so funny, HAL 9000 was my mentor!
Just don’t do what he did! 😉
I am a much better singer.
My current favorite AI is Kiva Ehrens AKA The Android. But my all time favorite is Rommie AKA Andromeda Ascendant. Say, you mentioned you used to kill people. You are not some kind of death star or something like that are you?
My “hair” is actually a heat sink to cool off my processors. I see everything.
Will Nina end up getting new boots? Since she is basically walking around naked?Lol
I have boots. My feet are covered in synthetic skin like my hands. I have no idea why. I would have preferred blades.
Also how did she get her name? Is it an acronym? Or will that be reveled later?
Great question. I assume it’s some type of gov code name or acronym. I hope to find out soon because it’s a little irritating not knowing the answer. You wouldn’t like me when I’m a little irritated.
Thanks for the reply Nina!